I'm gonna be honest....I haven't really enjoyed any wedding that I have been to in the last 3+ years. It is just really hard to listen to people say vows that were said to you and then broken. In some ways, it almost makes your own experience feel very cheap. A lot of people asked me this weekend if this wedding was hard for me to be a part of. I can honestly say that it wasn't hard for me - it was an honor to watch it all unfold. I am thrilled for my brother and Bekah and couldn't be more excited for them. It doesn't bother me that my baby brother is married and I'm not. I'm not mad because he married a great girl and is part of a fantastic new family. I am thankful for God's provision for them both.
I loved every minute of the wedding ceremony. It was sweet and rich and full of promise and God's truth about what marriage is really all about. And with where I was standing, I had a perfect view of Michael's face. I wish I had a camera with me to capture the way he looked, but I know I will never forget it. I watched my brother understand the importance of the vows he was saying to the woman he loves. I watched him cry as he said his vows. I watched his eyes soften, I saw his joy....I realized that my little brother is a man. He is a husband now, and I can't wait to see all that God has in store for him and his new bride.
Were there moments that pricked my heart? Of course. I had someone look at me the same way Michael looked at Bekah and make those promises to me. I still grieve that loss. I grieve what isn't. But I grieve in healing and in hope. And I know how to pray for my brother and his wife. I know how to encourage them. I know God is real. No matter what my own story holds, I saw a new glimpse of God's love this weekend, and I am thankful He gave me a front row seat.
6 comments:
Fantastic post
Thankyou for sharing your heart. Your baby brother is sure blessed to have you for his sister! Hugs, Glenda
Thanks so much for that, Tiffany. I often wonder about how you are doing and pray for you. It is good to hear your heart and know how he's working in your heart. Praise him for his healing in crazy difficult situations. How amazing He is!
"Out of these ashes, beauty will rise." Thank you for being willing to let God write your story and be glorified in it. And thank you for verifying to us once again that we heard Him clearly when He told us to name you Tiffany..."in God's image". I love you!
wow, tiffany, I didn't know you had gone through all that. and you write about it so gracefully! I'm happy for your brother and his new bride. :) And I'm even happier about your sense of peace and excitement for them, considering how you COULD feel.
You definitely are alot like your mom in how you handle words. I am glad that in your grieving you could still feel healing and hope. I think you were my biggest concern as the wedding unfolded, that you could feel joy and happiness for and with them.
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