It's Halloween?

Greetings! Today is October 28th. The high today in sunny Orlando? 91. Sorry for all of you who are already in the cold and gray weather. But it's hot here! I went to a pumpkin carving party on Saturday night. I purposely kept my pumpkin inside so that it wouldn't rot and put it outside only last night. This is what has happened to my poor sad pumpkin in one day in the Florida heat...

Isn't it so sad? I had created a cute little pirate pumpkin, complete with an eye patch. But alas, now he is rotting and full of mold and generally disgusting so he is going to be thrown in the trash before Halloween even gets here. I suppose that is the trade off for the warmth I am continuing to experience, although from what I'm told, this is abnormally warm right now.

Gotta run for now - Singing Christmas Tree practice calls. Hope your weeks are going well, and Ellie says hello! :)

Happy Weekend!

Greetings from the warm and sunny south and happy weekend to you all! I am so thankful for the weekend to be here. It was a long and crazy - though good - week, and having a chance to rest is rather glorious. I am sitting here writing this blog still in my pj's, even though it's past noon. Ahh, gotta love it!

Anyway, I do apologize for the length of time between blog posts. I had such a great time in the Great White North and just didn't have time to post a blog from there or earlier this week, but we'll get caught up now....if anyone still reads my blog.... :)

I spent last weekend in the Great White North, getting to hang out with my brother and his fiance, catching up with old friends. And let me tell you, it was COLD!!!! From the time I got on the plane in Orlando to getting off the plane in Boston, there was a temperature drop of 50 degrees. Thankfully I took my puffy, so that helped keep me warm, but it was freezing. Most of the weekend was cloudy, gray and rainy, which helped me remember some of why I love living down here so much more. I think I am addicted to sunshine!!

On to the weekend....I was able to spend some time with my old co-workers, and that was really fun. It was great to see everybody and get caught up a bit. I was also able to spend time hanging out with some of my favorite people up there from the church, and it was awesome to just hang out and relax with friends. Most of all, I really enjoyed getting to spend time with Michael and Bekah. I have known Bekah for awhile, but I haven't spent time with her in the context of her being my soon-to-be sister-in-law. I also hadn't been around the two of them since they first started dating, and I enjoyed watching their interactions. I never thought I'd see my baby brother be smitten and lovey dovey with a girl, and it was so cute! :) They were kind enough to allow me to take some engagement pictures for them, so we all braved the freezing cold for a couple of hours to see what we could do. The following images are some of my favorite.





Michael and Bekah were kind enough to ask me to be a bridesmaid in the wedding, which I was very honored by. Brother Matthew will be a participant as well, as the best man, so it will be a fun family affair. I am truly excited to be a part of their lives and have a front row seat to the story God is writing for them.

Although it was super cold in the Great White North, one really cool thing happened. For those of you who have followed my blog for awhile, you know how God used snow in so many different ways to show me how much He loved me while I lived there. It has always been something that made my heart smile, as I think it to be one of God's most beautiful creations. While I am thankful for where God has me now and truly love living back in the south, there are certainly elements of living up north that I will miss. I mostly miss the people, but while I am thankful I won't have 5 months of winter, I confess I will miss seeing snow fall. And in a most gracious gift to me, early and somewhat out of season, on my last night in Boston, this happened...


It snowed for about 4 hours, and it was beautiful! I went out and stood in the street while it fell around me and even drove around for a bit. I considered it to be such a gift from God, and it was really cool.

I will try to update my blog again soon, as there are some awesome things going on that I'd like to share. For now though, I am going to go enjoy this day of relaxation before heading to a pumpkin carving party later tonight. Have a great weekend!

Redemption In Many Forms

Greetings on this lovely Sunday! I am sitting here on this day of rest, enjoying the sunshine and the peacefulness that comes from not having to go anywhere or do anything. It's been a crazy few days of life and I wanted to fill you in a bit. First of all, I spent 3 hours Friday night and about 5 hours yesterday at rehearsal for the Singing Christmas Trees. We were actually recording all 12 songs that we are singing in the show so that they can have a CD ready to sell at the performances. I must say that it was a lot of fun! It's really nice to just be a participant in a big production instead of being one of the people in charge of making it happen. And I'm having a lot of fun singing Christmas songs! :)

But the most important news that I have to announce is that my youngest brother asked his girlfriend to marry him on Thursday night!! Yep, Michael and Bekah are engaged!!! I am thrilled for them and so excited to welcome Bekah into our family. We all went to the same church in the Great White North, and I must confess that I thought she was perfect for my brother long before they started dating! I plan on taking some engagement pictures for them when I visit next weekend, so of course I'll post those when I have them, but for now, here is one I took on an earlier visit.

I must say that if I needed any sort of proof of the miracle that God has worked in my heart and the healing He has done, it came in the form of my reaction to this news. To be totally honest, I have wondered at times how I would react to people I love getting engaged and married. I wasn't sure I would really be able to be excited and that I would have a really hard time with it, for a variety of reasons. But I can truthfully say that when my brother called me with the news, I was nothing but thrilled and excited and filled with joy. I am thankful that I am going to be able to share in this journey with them and be a part of the story God is writing for their lives. And folks, that is a miracle.

I genuinely desire that someday I will be able to post a blog that announces my own engagement and that God has that as part of His redemption for my story. Whether or not that specifically happens for me, I am learning that redemption comes in many forms. It shows up in unexpected places, perhaps when we least expect it. But it's there, and it's as real as the God who makes it possible. And for now, redemption showed up in the form of a big sister being proud of and excited for her little brother, and deeply grateful for the God who made that moment possible.

Workin' Girl

Greetings from the HOT sunshine state! Yes, it's October 8th, and our highs this week are in the mid 90's! It's hard to believe that it is actually October because of that, but I must admit that I am still enjoying the sunny warmth. It's glorious! And when all of you who live in the north get tired of the cold, you can come visit me this winter. :)

So thankfully tomorrow is Friday! I am soooo tired. I had forgotten what it was like to work full-time for a whole week, but I am now remembering how tiring it is. My temp job is going very well, and I am really enjoying working at this company. I am working in the HR department of IBC/Merita bakeries. They make things such as bread and twinkies. The HR office is next to one of their bakeries, and it smells so fantastic whenever you're outside. And my car has a permanent coating of flour dust on it!! I'm not sure how long this job will last - right now they are hoping to keep me through the month of November, but I don't know if that will be the case or not - but I am thankful for the provision while I have it and will think about what to do next when the time comes!

In random updates on my life.... I got a haircut. Here is a picture my talented roommate took...

Nikki and I are singing in the First Baptist Orlando Singing Christmas Tree this year. We've been in rehearsals for about 6 weeks now, and I LOVE it!! I am having so much fun being part of a great choir. There are about 400 singers, so it's really cool and I think the shows are going to be awesome. And I can't wait to be in a Christmas tree! I'll be sure and get some pictures and tell you more about it when it gets closer. For now, here are a couple of pictures from a previous year. Because there are so many people, they have 2 trees. Here is a picture of them so you can see how the choir fits in and then a pictures with the trees lit up, when you can't see the singers at all.


Next weekend, I am going to the Great White North to visit brother and friends, and I can't wait! I decided to go for a long weekend so I can get a taste of fall. There promises to be many picture opportunities, and I will have much to share with you, so keep checking the blog for cool posts to come!

I am missing my family tonight and hating that we are in 4 separate states. So here is a picture of us so that I can smile. :) Hope you all have a great weekend!

Fried Okra

I'm a southern girl through and through, and I LOVE fried okra. It is one of my very favorite southern foods. I missed eating it so much during my two years in the Great White North. Now that I am back in the south, I have had it a couple of times at Cracker Barrel or other such places, but I decided that I couldn't call myself a true southerner if I had never made it myself. They had some at the grocery store the other day, so I got some, hoping to have a successful attempt at cooking this fabulous food. I was so proud of myself that my first try came out so well. Here is picture proof!!

I will definitely be making this again! And I am excited that I have added this southern delicacy to my cooking repertoire.

In other news, I have a temp job! It should last for a few weeks, and while it might not be permanent, it's still a step in the right direction. I am working in an HR office, helping them with their recruitment, and I think I am going to enjoy it a lot. I worked half a day on Friday, but starting Monday, I'll be doing the 8 hour a day thing again for the first time in awhile. It'll be good to get in a bit of a routine. I'll keep you posted on all of the happenings. For now, have a great weekend!

Unredeemed

Hey everybody! It's been awhile since I wrote one of those blogs - where I let you know what's happening in my life and give a little insight into a deeper part of my soul. So I thought I'd do that today, as another week begins with me still searching for a job. I am including a few of my favorite pictures in this just to help break up all of the words!

I have been in Orlando for 3 full months now and cannot believe that it is about to be October. In my wildest dreams, I never imagined that I would still not have a job. And even though there is a good amount of stress that comes with not having a job and needing money to pay bills, I am also thankful for this time that God has given me.

2009 has been a long year. I have battled so much anxiety and stress, dealing with the physical effects of that, including heart palpitations and such. I have never struggled with my health in any way, so this has been a new thing for me and I haven't really enjoyed it! But I've learned a lot about myself this year and a lot about God, and I'm thankful for this journey even though I'm more than ready to move on from it.

After dealing with pretty severe heart palpitations for awhile, I finally ended up at the doctor about a month ago. Most of you remember earlier in the year when I had an allergic reaction and severe withdrawal from the meds that were suggested for anxiety the first time around, so you can imagine my hesitancy in trying anything again. But after talking with my new doctor here and explaining what happened and my history, he suggested a very mild anti-anxiety medication for me to try that he thought might really work for me. After doing much research and speaking to several very trusted people, I decided to try it. I had come to the realization that some issues were going on that needed to be dealt with, but it's very hard to deal with issues when your body is not healthy, so I knew I needed to let my body recover as well.

So here we are now....and the medication seems to be working really well! I am no longer having heart palpitations, and I feel so much more relaxed and able to handle life like a "normal" person. I have also been back in counseling, with a fantastic counselor through a church here in the area. God has been revealing so much to me, both about Himself and in some of the ways that I need to change. It has been fantastic, painful and glorious, and healing continues to occur. In all of it, I am feeling much more hopeful and excited about whatever it is that God has in store for me. I think sometimes it's so easy to get caught up in and believe the lies that are whispered about who we are and who God is, and being reminded of the truth and walking in it makes a huge difference.

As of this moment, there are a few things that you can pray for. First of all, I really need a job. Even Chick-fil-a is not hiring here. Pray that God will open a door very soon. Secondly, the medication is working splendidly. The only negative about it is that I am shedding hair at a pretty rapid rate. I don't want to stop taking the medication right now because my body is finally recovering, but I don't want to go bald either. :) So please pray that the excessive hair shedding (apparently a common thing) will stop immediately. Finally, pray that God will continue to reveal those places in my life that need to be refined and that I will have the courage to follow Him and trust Him as He continues to heal and reveal the story He has written for my life.

I realize the title of this blog post might sound weird, so let me explain it. There is a group called Selah, and they have a new CD out. One of their songs on there is called "Unredeemed" (lyrics at the bottom of this post or listen here). It has been a powerful reminder for me lately as I reflect on what has happened over the past few years. We base our view of God so often on the circumstances we see around us and in our own lives. We doubt His love for us because of what is happening to us, and yet if we just look at the cross, it shows us the depth of His love in such a way that we should never have any questions about how He feels about us. So often people will say to me, "I just know God is going to bless you with an amazing godly man and a great marriage to redeem what happened to you." Maybe He will. Or maybe He won't. But no matter what parts of life here on this earth may be left unfulfilled or unrestored in our eyes, they will never be left unredeemed. Even if it doesn't look like how we think it should or how we want it to here on this earth, there will come a day when all will be made right and new, and nothing will be unredeemed. Until that day, may we cling tightly to the only One who is unchanging, who is faithful and true, and who gives us more than we could ever ask or imagine. Love you all!

"Unredeemed"

The cruelest words, the coldest heart
The deepest wounds, the endless dark
The lonely ache, the burning tears
The bitter nights, the wasted years

Life breaks and falls apart
But we know these are

[Chorus]
Places where grace is soon to be so amazing
They may be unfulfilled, they may be unrestored
But when anything that’s shattered is laid before the Lord
Just watch and see it will not be
Unredeemed

For every choice that led to shame
And all the love that never came
For every vow that someone broke
And every life that gave up hope

We live in the shadow of the fall
But the cross says these are all …

[Chorus]

Places where grace is soon to be so amazing
They may be unfulfilled, they may be unrestored
But you never know the miracles the Father has in store
Just watch and see it will not be
Just watch and see it will not be
Unredeemed

Odds And Ends

This shall be a random post about a few random things. I am waiting to hear about a job, so in order to pass the time, there are many things to do. The other day, Nikki and I (along with the visiting Ashley), went shopping for some nail polish. Here in the fabulous sunshine state, you can wear flip flops almost all year long, which I love. But that requires freshly painted nails, and we were in need of some new colors. We found a great deal - bottles for only $2, and I had a giftcard! Here is a picture of a new color - this is "Ruby Slippers", and in case you can't tell from the picture, there are red sparklies in the polish that make my toes look like Dorothy's ruby slippers. :)

While I am enjoying sunshine, in my home state of Georgia, there is much flooding going on. There have been all kinds of crazy stories, as some of the worst flooding has happened not far from where I grew up. Here is a picture that our next door neighbor took of the view of the road from our old subdivision...

Crazy, isn't it? Hopefully everything will clear up soon without much more damage.

Finally, what would killing time be if not torturing my cat with self portraits of us??? She gets so excited about this and loves me so much for taking pictures repeatedly. I will leave you with these joyful greetings from me and Ellie. Please pray that a job opens up soon, and we'll keep you posted!

Disney In The "Fall"

So I did something today that is new for me - I went to the Magic Kingdom by myself!! :) It was actually fun, although slightly weird to be at Disney without anyone else. I only rode a couple of rides, but my purpose in going was to take some pictures of the fun fall/Halloween decorations that they have up. It's kind of funny to see these fallish decorations, as it was in the low 90's today, with horrible humidity, BUT....it is mid-September after all. So without further ado, here are lots of pictures that should make you want to come visit yourselves! There are such small crowds now - you don't have to wait long for anything.

Notice the Disney World train in this picture!




This is Main Street. My favorite ice cream parlor is in the picture on the left. They have the BEST ice cream!!! And yet, even with a season pass, I have not gotten any yet since I've been here. Maybe next time....

And now here is Main Street from the front, so you can see the castle in the background.

Speaking of the castle, they have already started putting lights on it for the Christmas season. They can only do these things at night after the park is closed - no one is allowed to see the transformation. On the day after Thanksgiving, the park will just magically be transformed to Christmas. If you look closely, you can see where they have started decorating the castle.

This is a random picture, but I love Piglet. Doesn't he look cute in the tree?

Now, these next pictures are for my friend Tessa. Tess - I thought you might want to see pictures of where Cinderella lives. This is her castle....you can see the front and side views.


Here is a picture of the entrance to the castle and what it looks like when you walk inside.


So there is Cinderella's home. And now for a picture of Cinderella and her prince!

And I also saw Belle today!

Mickey and Minnie even said to tell you hello!

So Tessa, I hope you enjoyed all of your pictures! I miss you! :)

As I left Disney today, this was the scene and the goodbye message for me. It made me smile. Have a great night!

My Cute Cat

Hi everybody! I wanted to show you some pictures of Ellie because she is such a cute cat! She has enjoyed living in Orlando so far. She loves going out on our balcony and rolling on the concrete, eating bugs, letting her fur get blown in the wind.... It's really funny because she sticks her head through the rails on the balcony. Here is some Ellie cuteness.

She also loves laying on the piano because she can see out of the balcony doors...

I went for a walk this evening, and here are a few pictures from that. We have these crazy birds that walk around our apartment all the time, and when they are agitated, they make this horribly LOUD screaming noise. When they stand up to their full height, they are almost as tall as I am! They were walking down the sidewalk tonight, and I got out of their way. I wonder what they were talking about as they walked!

We get some really pretty skies and clouds here as the sun sets...

Finally, here is a picture of me and my cat. It's horrible of us both (I had just gotten back from the walk), but perhaps it will make you smile!

More to come soon....enjoy your weekend!

Life

Greetings to you all on a cloudy day here in the "Sunshine State". It's been a tough couple of weeks, and I find myself almost at a loss as to how to put words to all that is taking place. I'll do my best though!

To begin, my friends Jenn and Will had their first baby last week. She is so beautiful and so incredibly tiny! I got to hold her in the hospital when she was only hours old, and we spent some time with them yesterday at their house. Here is a picture of her.

It's amazing to me to look at a newborn and realize we all started out that way - tiny, completely helpless and fully dependent on others for everything. And yet as adults, we try to do everything on our own, depending on no one. When does that transformation happen? When do we get to the place where it is considered a weakness to show the depths of our struggles? And what makes us fight against a complete dependence on God? There is no safer place to be than resting fully in Him, and yet we often fight that with everything we have.

In the last two weeks, I have traveled to the Great White North and to GA for a weekend. Out of the time spent in each place, goodbyes took place. One goodbye was to a fantastic guy that I had the privilege of getting to spend a few months getting to know but who ultimately just wasn't the best fit for me. The other goodbyes were to people who have been a part of my life for years but who it was time to let go of and move on from. Both situations were painful, for different reasons, but both were also necessary.

I must confess I am tired of this journey. It's been a long few years, and I wish sometimes that God would hurry the process up and that I would be done with this particular road. And yet, everything I have walked through and continue to walk through has forced me into a dependence on God not unlike being a newborn. I can't do anything in this life apart from Him, and when I try....well, it isn't pretty.

I am weary. I am sad. I still need a job. I still have dreams that may or may not come true. I miss my family. I miss my church. I continue to battle the physical effects of stress. But I am okay. And God is good. Jesus loves me. And that is enough.